Tuesday, January 27, 2009
GOING CRAZY??
Well, today was a horrible day. It started off at 9 am today when I went to court to meet the judge in my divorce. It was about a 3 minute meeting where nothing happened except for me receiving a new court date for 2 March. 2 MARCH!! That's over a month away. So here I am just waiting to see when it will be final. I was hoping it wouldn't drag out this long, but that's life. Also, my best friend Krista is getting divorced. Another thing I found out this morning. It seems her husband of approx 10 yrs decided he didn't love her anymore. She then looked at his email and saw that he had been emailing other women looking to cheat if he hasn't already. That was deja vu for me as that exact thing had been happening to me for the past 2 years! What is it with men!! I know there are good ones out there, but someone please show me where they are. I really didn't think my own fairy tale of lasting love and a wonderful family was too much to ask, but apparently it is. Why do people have to be so cruel and thoughtless, especially to those they claim to love so dearly. I don't think I will ever understand it and my idea of NEVER getting deeply involved with another man is affirmed with Krista getting divorced. Well, I guess that's enough bitching for now, I just had to get that off my chest. I really feel as though I am building up a lot of anger towards men and people in general and it's probably not a good thing. I was offered some free counseling by my case worker after the incident with Juan, and I'm thinking I might need a couple of sessions. I thought I could handle it all on my own, but things just keep going the opposite direction that I need them to and I don't want to become a bitter, depressed person. I try and think of all the blessings in my life like family and Dominik, but those things have been getting overshadowed a lot by all this legal bullcrap and my continuing struggle to lose the weight I put on over the last 6 months due to my relationship that I was in. If anyone reading this pray, please say one for me to get through all this without losing my sanity.
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I think we have all been fed the fairy tale crap since birth, and it's given us a false sense of reality. I'm starting to think that's what my problem is.
ReplyDeleteI would highly recommend taking that free counseling. It's worth a shot, right? It helps to be able to talk to someone who's not emotionally involved and who actually has some expertise in giving advice. I wish I had some good advice to give. But I don't. Just know that I'm thinking about you.
Hey Bri, I'm sorry that things are so crappy for you right now. Seems like it all hits at once and that makes it hard to concentrate on those good things you mentioned. I think it would be a good idea to go and talk to someone. I had several different counselors that helped me through some of the tough times over the years. And if it's free?!? Go for it!
ReplyDeleteAlso, don't be afraid to give a call. I may not have good advice, but I can usually listen pretty well.
I'm really sorry to hear about Krista. I DO think we are living in a society where it has become much too easy to cheat and get involved in stuff that will destroy family life.
I will pray for the both of you.
Hang in there sweetie!